Thursday, December 5, 2019

#AmReading YA

We Used to Be Friends
Amy Spalding
Age/Genre: Young Adult, Contemporary
Publisher: Amulet
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
Goodreads
Two best friends grow up—and grow apart—in this innovative contemporary YA novel

Told in dual timelines—half of the chapters moving forward in time and half moving backward—We Used to Be Friends explores the most traumatic breakup of all: that of childhood besties. At the start of their senior year in high school, James (a girl with a boy’s name) and Kat are inseparable, but by graduation, they’re no longer friends. James prepares to head off to college as she reflects on the dissolution of her friendship with Kat while, in alternating chapters, Kat thinks about being newly in love with her first girlfriend and having a future that feels wide open. Over the course of senior year, Kat wants nothing more than James to continue to be her steady rock, as James worries that everything she believes about love and her future is a lie when her high-school sweetheart parents announce they’re getting a divorce. Funny, honest, and full of heart, We Used to Be Friends tells of the pains of growing up and growing apart.
Kat and James had been best friends since they were serendipitously paired together in Kindergarten. Both were looking forward to senior year for different reasons. Kat just wanted to get though this last year, and was anticipating all the new experiences waiting for her in college, while James was eager to be a senior and to enjoy her final year of high school with her best friend at her side. However, neither expected it would be the end of a decade long friendship.

I am telling you, right now, I had a headache, when I finished this book, due to all the crying I did. Romantic breakups are painful, but we rarely acknowledge how traumatic a friend breakup can be. My tears are evidence, that Spalding did a fantastic job depicting the collapse of this storied friendship. So, considered yourself warned.

Spalding told this story from both Kat and James' point of view, but she did so, from opposite ends of the timeline. James' story began at the end, with her leaving town for college, and Kat's started from the beginning of the school year. I found the dual timeline to be quite successful and meaningful for me. James' narrative had more insight, since she could reflect on the past, while Kat's had more unknown's. Since there was overlap, I also experienced many things in multiple ways, and we all know, perspective is everything. It was interesting the way their life situations were flipped, too. Kat's year started with heartbreak, and ended with everything coming up roses, while it was the opposite for James.

James' point of the view definitely elicited more tears from me. Her life sort of imploded, and everything she believed in seemed like a lie. There were some positive things that came out of what happened, and Spalding left me hopeful for other things, but James lost a lot, and it broke my heart watching her slow retreat from everyone and her self-imposed isolation.

Kat's side of the story made me smile a whole lot. Her family was still in the process of healing following her mother's death, and they were slowly regrouping. Not only was Kat's home life improving, but she fell in love and discovered a lot about herself, included that she was bisexual. The friend breakup seemed to leave more of a mark on Kat, as well, and she tried to make some changes in order to be a better person.

This was a story that resonated with me, because I have experienced those painful friend breakups, and I believe many others will be able to relate to Kat and James' story as well.

Overall: A sensitive and emotional tale of loss, love, healing, and self discovery.

**ARC received in exchange for an honest review.

Something Like Normal
Trish Doller
Age/Genre: Young Adult, Contemporary, Romance
Publisher: Bloomsbury
Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars
Goodreads
When Travis returns home from a stint in Afghanistan, his parents are splitting up, his brother’s stolen his girlfriend and his car, and he’s haunted by nightmares of his best friend’s death. It’s not until Travis runs into Harper, a girl he’s had a rocky relationship with since middle school, that life actually starts looking up. And as he and Harper see more of each other, he begins to pick his way through the minefield of family problems and post-traumatic stress to the possibility of a life that might resemble normal again. Travis’s dry sense of humor, and incredible sense of honor, make him an irresistible and eminently lovable hero.
Travis had joined the Marines to escape his life, but he returned, and he brought some baggage with his. He was dreading going back to his parents' home, but while there, he found love, forgiveness, and some peace of mind.

Coming from a family filled with military personal, I have always had a lot of respect for what they do to protect my country and my freedoms. Therefore, I have a certain appreciation for stories like Travis'. There were so many things about his story, that I loved, but first and foremost, I liked, that Doller did not politicize this story.

This was a story about one young solider's experience in-country and upon his return. It was about the way his deployment affected and shaped him, and changed his view of things back home. I thought Doller beautifully captured his struggle with coming back, and realizing how different he was. It was hard for him to relate to old friends, and he had a different appreciation for the people in his life. He realized, that some really didn't, or never did, fit, while making him value others a bit more.

When my father talked about his time in the army, or even about his 25 years in the NY fire department, he often waxed poetic about the "brotherhood". He shared, that there was a special relationship you foster, when you are in life or death situations with other people, and this came through so clearly as Travis related stories about his time in Afghanistan, or when he interacted with his fellow soldiers on-page. I could almost see a physical bond between them, which was formed via the things they endured.

Though, there were flashbacks to his time in-country and Travis was experiencing PTSD, I also got to share some fun and beautiful moments with him. I loved that he reconnected with his mother. His family was obviously trying to win dysfunctional family of the year, but his mother was so wonderful. Travis' time away gave him the strength and perspective he didn't have before, and not only did he see his mother in a different light, he was better equipped to give her the support she needed.

And, then, there was Harper. Harper was his first kiss, but he let something so sweet turn ugly. I was sort of stunned by the long lasting affects on her life, but I was glad she was able to overlook it, and open her heart to Travis. Her high school years may have been hell, but Harper certainly had her act together. She was stable and able to open her heart to Travis. I found the accelerated nature of their relationship quite believable, and really enjoyed all the time I got to share with them.

Overall: An emotional, raw, and real look at the life of a young soldier, which I thought was beautifully written and well explored.



Did you like stories with alternate time structures?
Let us know in the comments!

22 comments:

  1. I"ve been wondering myself if I am in the middle of a friend break-up and I am holding on to something that I shouldn't be. i don't even know any more. That blurb and your review just made me sigh so heavily and relate to it.

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    1. ((HUGS)) friend breakups are hard, and the slowly growing apart is hard to recognize too.

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  2. Friend breakups are horrific. I don't think We Used To Be Friends is one I'm ever likely to read but I'm curious about the duel pov at opposite ends of the timeline! That sounds very cleverly done.

    Something Like Normal is more up my street! I'll keep my eyes open for that one.

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    1. I feel like We Used to Be Friends will hit someone, who has experienced that sort of loss harder than someone who has not. I thought the timeline thing was an interesting approach, because I knew where things were going, but didn't have all the details to how they got there. Something Like Normal was really good. Travis makes a few dumb decisions, when he first comes home, but that changed quickly, and all I saw was this man struggling with his feelings about being a solider, the loss of his friend, and temporarily being back in a life that no longer fits, all while trying to be the man he had become in-country.

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  3. Being married to a 20+ year veteran, I always feel a real connection to stories that feature characters who serve. It’s cringey when it’s obvious the author did no research or has no first-hand experience, and the fact that the character is/was military is just used as a plot device (the kinds where every guy is a Navy SEAL or fighter pilot). But when it’s done right it can really resonate. And I felt like Doller truly got it right. My heart hurt for Travis and all that he was dealing with when he got home.

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    1. This book was billed as a romance, and there was plenty of that, but it was more Travis' story for me, and I think it was because Dollar did her research, interviewed many vets and active duty military to get that perspective and the emotions Travis was experiencing just right.

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  4. Great reviews! Something Like Normal sounds like it can be intense but in a good way.

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    1. It really was. An absolutely gritty, real, and moving story.

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  5. glad you enjoyed them. thanks for sharing
    sherry @ fundinmental

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  6. The end of a friendship can be worse than the end of a romance especially for young adults. I love the way it sounds like the book is set up. I will have to try to work that one in at some point. Something Like Normal sounds equally amazing.

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    1. Exactly! I think there is always a part of you that can imagine a romance fizzling out, but you don't usually think that about your lifelong friends.

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  7. I wanted to shed a tear or two just reading your review of that first book. That is definitely a sad but all too relatable topic.

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    1. If you only knew how much poor James went through, and how much it affected her world.

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  8. I've had a copy of Something Like Normal sitting on my shelf for YEARS. YEARS! I was kind of over the sex heavy new adult phase but had no idea how beautifully written it was with an incredible amount of depth. I need to dust off my copy and move it onto my TBR. Beautiful review Sam, really enjoyed it.

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    1. There is some sex, 2 maybe 3 scenes (2 really short ones, which make sense for the story), but it doesn't feel (I hate to say this) new adult. It felt like Travis' story to me, and it had a lot of substance. The romance was secondary, if you ask me, and I really felt like I was pulled into Travis' internal conflict.

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  9. I absolutely love the concept behind We Used to Be Friends, and your review has made me want to pick it up even more!

    Nicole @ Feed Your Fiction Addiction

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    1. A lot of other readers were saying how not enough attention is given to the ending of platonic relationships. These can be just as devastating as the end of romantic relationships, and I think a lot of people can find they relate to this situation

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  10. We Used to Be Friends sounds so emotional. I love a dual timeline story, and it's interesting how one moves forwards and one backwards.

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    1. I have seen similar things done with the timeline, but usually they meet somewhere and go forward together. This kept the backwards/forwards thing all the way through, and I found it an interesting way to let the story unfold.

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  11. I still actually don't think I could read We Used to Be Friends. I used to be part of a 4 girl, incredibly tight friendship that started in primary school and fell apart in my final year of high school, right before prom and graduation and everything happened. It was incredibly hard for me especially as the three of them stayed friends and completely ditched me after all our years together. So yeah, I think friend break ups are still worse than romantic ones and I think I would be way too emotional reading it ;.; I am glad you appreciated it so much though! As for the second book, I have read a lot of new adult which focuses on the military and returning from it, and what the country does or does not do to provide for returning military men in America!

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    1. ((HUGS)) that's awful. I cried during that book, because I had been part of a trio, and when I came back from vacation, they were no longer talking to me. I still don't know why and it's been over 30 years.

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